4 min read

Mother's Day Special: How Losing My Mom Redefined the Meaning of a "Simple Life"

Mother's Day Special: How Losing My Mom Redefined the Meaning of a "Simple Life"

Life is only simple if you can make it simple.

Not even a mindset shift or personal contentment can make life simple.

Whoever says otherwise hasn't gone through the realities of life: it's unforgiving and heeds no one.

The best we can do in life is to grow so much that we become people who are capable of staying afloat despite the soul-sinking waves of life.

Harsh reality? It is what it is.

Let's not construe life as a fairy tale because it's not. It's far from it.

And here's why...

The "Good Life"

In school, life's good. You feel as though life is perfect this way.

You don't have to think about anything else, you're okay with a simple life.

A simple life where there is food on the table, there is a roof over your head, your family is complete, and you're contented.

This is a life that is enough for you.

But is it really?

I used to think that way too until my mom got diagnosed with end-stage cancer.

Suddenly my definition of a perfect life was shattered and life's harsh reality sucker-punched me in the face: we are susceptible to the unpredictable winds of life be it a gentle wind or a gust of despair.

Our Journey with Cancer

If you have someone in your life with cancer, you'd understand how it changes someone.

Suddenly my mother who was filled with energy became weak and very quiet.

The entire journey seemed like life was slowly draining her away.

Don't get me wrong, she was strong in every definition of the word.

She was resilient much like how most loving mothers are.

But cancer was too strong, that even her positive mental attitude and resilient core weren't enough to sustain her beyond her end.

What was it like seeing all that unfold as an average college kid without any valuable skill other than his curiosity and technology skills?

It was tough.

I prayed. I hoped. I wished. I willed.

I did everything.

Nothing was enough. I was penniless. I had a net worth of $0 and didn't know how I could scale my technical skills enough for me to finance my mother's treatments.

My dad was able to provide for her treatment needs, but I wished I could've done something more than watch. Yes, I was able to provide my love and time, but I wished I could've done so much more. I wished I had something more within me that would give her a better last few months.

I was so frustrated with my own lack, that it destroyed my very own definition of a simple life.

It is only simple if you are capable of making it simple for the people you love.

Simple isn't SIMPLE

Debt isn't simple. Earning money isn't simple. Getting the best doctors for treatment isn't simple. Availing of the best machines for treatment isn't simple. etc...

Do you have the money to get the best? Do you have the skills to bring the best?

No. You don't.

You see, despite your desire for things to go your way. It rarely does.

That's why a simple life isn't just being contented with what you have because chances are life will throw one complicated rock your way and you'd be shocked to see that contentment can't pay for your hospital bills.

Some would say that understanding what's not in your control could simplify life for you because if it's out of your control, then it's not worth thinking about right?

However, If I may ask...

How can you be certain that it is out of your control if you haven't even tried the best the world can offer?

What if the best people combined with the best tools can solve your problem?

You can't know unless you try. Hence you can only truly know if it's out of your control if you've already tried the best the world can offer.

What is a "Simple Life"?

A simple life is where you have the capacity to make it simple.

It means having great insurance coverage for critical illness emergencies. It means having high-leveraged skills to make the bank and set your family's future with stability.

It means building yourself to a high enough caliber, that you can mobilize the best of the world to do their best in helping you solve your problem.

At the moment that the best still isn't enough, you can be 100% certain that it is indeed out of your control.

It is something that nothing in our world offers can solve. You have done everything you can.

You can be at peace.

This is the very definition of a simple life.

A life where the tools in your arsenal can bring you peace and in today's world this can only be achieved if you are capable of availing peace.

  • When you can afford comprehensive insurance policies
  • When you can afford the best hospitals
  • When you can afford a house away from harm
  • When you can afford food on the table to sustain your family

A lot more.

Make life simple, by thriving in the complexities of life

How am I pursuing a simple life after everything?


Be 100% accountable for my life and pursue growth efficiently because these will compound my competency to a level where I can avail the best of this world.

You can do the same.